I have been thinking about writing this post for a week now, and it’s just not something I have been wanting to do. But seeing as how there have been so many of you visit my blog and share your well wishes and prayers, I feel it is important to let you know what’s happened…
On Thursday, July 22nd, we learned that we had lost our baby. I had a routine OB appointment, and was scheduled for an ultrasound to check up on the Sub chorionic Hemorrhage and to see if there was one baby or two. The first thing the midwife did was check for a fetal heartbeat via doppler. She tried for 5 minutes and couldn’t find it. We then had an agonizing one hour wait before we could see the us tech. I was trying so hard not to be dismal, but I just knew that something was very wrong.
The ultrasound showed no baby, no sac, nothing. Just my empty uterus :( Apparently sometime during my heavy bleeding, I miscarried. I was very watchful during that time, and I hadn’t noticed anything, so I had no idea. I did find it strange that I wasn’t really having many pregnancy symptoms, but I just figured that would catch up to me in my second trimester.
But alas, that is not to be. We have accepted our loss (as we are painfully aware that these things happen) and are going forward with life. We are very saddened by our loss, but we are taking comfort in the knowledge that God is in control and He knows what is best for our family. We completely trust Him and He has given us peace about the situation. The timing of this pregnancy was not the best, and we are trying to focus on knowing that when we do get pregnant again, we will hopefully be in a much more settled environment.
We have decided that once we get settled into the Army life and we have good health coverage, we are going to see about getting a full panel done to see exactly why I have continued to have issues maintaining pregnancies.
I am focusing my time and energy on loving and nourishing the four beautiful children God has already entrusted me with. I am so thankful to have each of them, especially in the light of recent events. They are all miracles in my eyes and we are so blessed to have them! I thank God everyday that He gave them to us.
I am sorry this news was so delayed, I am sure you understand how hard the past few weeks have been for us. I am so thankful for each and every prayer and well-wishes that you, my readers and my friends, have shared over the past month. I am deeply touched that you have kept my family in your thoughts.